Bastard WordPress ate my post. I was eating one of the blogged muffins whilst WordPress ate my post. I shall retype it now but it won’t be as good or funny or anything.
Anyway, I’m at home tonight, enjoying cereal for supper whilst the boyfriend squires my Ma to a gig in that there youthful Camden. NewHuman has been front-loaded with a massive feed and he’s currently passed out, snoring like a tramp after an unexpected cider bonus. Long may it continue.
I may* even crack a beer.
** Probably won’t, but will spend ages thinking about cracking a beer.
Anyway the below is a bastardisation of a Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall recipe, originally found in The Guardian. He uses wholemeal flour and walnuts. Crazy man. I used plain white flour and substituted the nuts for white chocolate bits. I’m very smart.
Stick your oven on to preheat to 200C or Gas Mark 6.
125g porridge oats
100g light brown or muscovado sugar
3 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 largish egg, lightly beaten
100ml whole milk
100ml natural plain yoghurt
50g butter, melted
100g white chocolate bits
Bit of Demerara sugar, for sprinkling
Muffin cases, if you’re into that sort of thing
Mix together all the dry ingredients in a bowl. Mix together all the wet ingredients (not the fruit/choc, obv) in another bowl.
I put the warm butter into the cold yoghurt and milk because I am an idiot. Don’t do this. Let your butter cool. Mine went well gross but I used it anyway. Things turned out fine.
Mix the wet stuff into the dry. Barely mix. I mean it. Kind of wave a spatula over the top of the bowl in a vague mixing kind of way.
It’ll look like sick, in the way of all good baking recipes.
Add your fruit and nuts. Barely mix it some more. BARELY. You basically want it on the verge of combined. Muffin making 101, that is.
NewHuman has quite deeply set wrinkles and he’s not a month old yet. Whilst I fully appreciate that having me as a mother is a wretched and awful thing, I’m a little concerned at his appearance. Is there such a thing as baby Botox? Of not, why not?
Spoon the mix into muffin cases. Or a muffin tin. Or, in my case, into muffin cases sitting in a muffin tin. Sprinkle over a generous amount of Demerara. Into the oven for about 25 mins.
Take out. Eat. Put the telly on mute and accidentally fall asleep whilst sat on the sofa, waking up about 42 mins later with drool (your own) on your shoulder, a hungry dog looking at you mournfully and a baby with a nappy so foul it should be illegal.