Chicken Curry For the Lazy


Curry. Excellent takeaway food. I didn’t really have a proper one till I moved to the UK, curry wasn’t part of my family’s rota of meals, unless you count Nana’s curried sausage casserole which I remain unaccountably fond of. Anyway, I made a curry the other day. I stuffed it up, of course, but not till the very end and not in a way which rendered it uneatable. I’m a white Anglo-ancestored Australian so am probably getting it all wrong, but this is my version which is mediumly spicy but very delicious.

Don’t, as I did, cook this if you’ve two nice loads of washing drying in the kitchen. Curried clothes are nowhere near as nice as curried chicken.

Right you are.


Chicken pieces – I used 4, skin off
Onions, two
Garlic, 4 or so cloves
Ginger, fresh, thumb-sized piece
Cumin seeds
Coriander seeds
Curry leaves
One green chilli, whole
Plain yoghurt or sour cream

I used less meat and more veg and so a single piece of chicken = a good serve with lots of sauce and veg.


In a dry pan, toast a good teaspoonful each of the cumin and coriander seeds. Should only take a couple of minutes – don’t let them burn. You’ll know they’re done as they’ll start to get very smelly. Nice smelly. Real chefs would probably say fragrant.

Whilst that’s happening, in a food processor whazz up the onion, garlic, ginger, chilli and turmeric into a paste. Add the roasted seeds and whazz up more, till they’re not seeds anymore.


Stick this oniony paste into a frypan with a little vegetable oil and start to cook. It’ll get even more fragrant. Don’t hurry this bit, let the paste cook a while over a gentle-ish heat, adding a bit more oil if it starts to look too dry. I haven’t taken a photo of what this might look like. Trust your instincts (if that’s safe, I’ve no idea).


Prepare and chop your veg in a manner which pleases you. I did so, and ended up with the above. Do this bit whilst the paste is cooking. Multi-tasking, it’s the cook’s friend.


Turn the heat up under the pan a little and roll the chicken bits around in the paste as if they were the elderly, oiled bodies of European gentlemen on a Spanish beach wearing speedos of indeterminate size, but definitely too small.

Add your veg, stir around and then pour in your tin of tomatoes. I usually add a bit of water here as well.


Make sure it resembles the above, somewhat.


At this point you think, ‘Oh shit, I forgot the curry leaves AGAIN!’, so add 3-4. You’ll find them later, stuck to your teeth.


I cooked this on a low, gentle heat for about 40 minutes. Check for seasoning. Then I added a tub of natural yoghurt and idiotically turned the heat up.

Curdles. NICE.

Add the yoghurt off the heat, then eat. Don’t be a dickhead, like me.

We ate with a naan from Sainsburys that the boyfriend helpfully picked up on his way home from a drunken 40th birthday in Manchester.

He’s, like, heaps older than me.



2 thoughts on “Chicken Curry For the Lazy

  1. narf77 says:

    Au contraire my dear…chicken curry for the TRULY lazy involves buying a rotisserie chook and bunging it in a can of curry sauce! You have may miles to go on the road to being truly lazy young padawan! ;). I, too, have a curry memory that haunts me. My Aunty Al’s sweet mince curry…every family reunion, birth, death, etc. had a “bring a plate” theme (there were a lot of us!) and there was always Aunty Al’s mince curry that EVERYONE loved! I swear it was just mince, curry powder and sugar with some sultanas thrown in and as vegan as I now am, I can still taste it from my memories :). My imported Brit and I make “real” curry from scratch making our own pastes…nothing else would do and we are thankful for Australia’s multicultural roots because we can get whatever we need here to facilitate a world cuisine of curries :).
    So long as you trust the instincts of the person who is going to eat said curry, it doesn’t matter HOW it turns out, it is going to be good eatin’ ;). I SUCK at multi tasking…working for as many years as I did in the hospitality industry, you soon learn your strengths and weaknesses and mine was multi tasking :(. I am one of those single purpose gals…bollocks to having a cake baking, grilling pancakes and steaks AND prepping soup veggies all at the same time! That chicken DOES look disturbingly like and aging German tourist who had his towel parked on the deckchair at the pool since midnight…The best way to eat curry is pissed…I bet your curdled curry tasted AMAZING to your ancient boyfriend ;).

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